Crusader Kings 2. A game of dynastic lineage, which allows you to control a noble house through the European middle ages. Sounds interesting.
First step is to pick a house to play as... Uh... not sure...
I guess I'm going to go with a random small time noble and try to work my way up. Earl Domnall of Oriel it is!
Ironman mode it is! I've never played before, what could go wrong?
Ok, September 15th, 1066... Let's see what we got...
Hmmmm... 36 years old and no wife and no sons? Geez, what is wrong with this guy? He's practically ancient! (in medieval years, anyways.) Time to go hunting for a marriageable lady out there, hopefully with huge... tracts of land...
So many choices!
Uh, how about this one? Hunydd, a welsh courtier?
Alright, marriage request away!
That was easy...
Let's see, what's next?
Let's try to produce an heir. Seems like a pretty medieval thing to do.
Oh no, my half brother wants a wife, too? geez.
Not many options... Oh well, so what if she's only 15 >,>;
Maybe time to expand? Send the spymaster to a neighboring county, let's see what happens.
Half brother is ready to get married...! Princess Ingrid of Denmark, not a bad catch.
1068
I need an heir, time to get... hedonic.
Accumulating some money so I can get some mercenaries to attack next door.
Time to sow some dissent before I go in for war...
1071
More sons, but not for the king... what a sad dude.
Finally pregnancy! >,>;
Oh no, a daughter!
Oh well, no son for you. Let's get over our sadness by hiring some mercenaries and going to war, shall we?
Alright, thanks to a mass of mercenaries, we won the battle! Time for the siege!
1072
That was pretty easy. Now ht earl of 2 counties!
Uh oh... looks like I uh... bonked my sister in law... She's now my lover, luckily my brother doesn't suspect anything. (Maybe that's why I'm the earl...)
Still no son, so the only logical conclusion is more crazy partying!
Oh dear, my lover Princess Ingrid is pregnant >,>; No birth control in 1072?
1074
Affair is becoming stressful... But if I go chaste I won't get an heir... gotta keep it up...
1078
My nephew has murdered my daughter D: Imprisonment it is!!! You'll die in the oubliette!
1079
Taking over more earldoms... Ulster is mine!
Huzzah! A son at last!
1079
Oh dear, I've been excommunicated at the request of the last lord I deposed, and it seems my crazy partying is keeping them from returning me to the church...
Oh well, might as well keep partying, at this point, why not?
1081
Oops, my brother wanted his own territory, and I didn't realize I would totally lose control of it! Oops! Plus, I'm still his wife's lover, and now she's like all the way in the other county >,>;
1085
After 5 years of bribing the pope, I'm finally back in the church!
1087
Man, guy is getting old, it's been 20 years since his reign began at the age of 39. But apparently he's still got it where it counts, another (legitimate) baby is on the way! (Not to mention the couple of children by my lover...)
1089
Hah! He's still falling for it! That daughter of yours certainly has my eyes....
1093
All right, after years of trying to fabricate a claim on a neighbor, it's finally time to take it over!
Victory is so easy!
1094
Ugh, my lover is annoyed that I might love my wife more than her! Time to end this relationship...
I've decided to go honest! (After lying about my affair for uh 26 years)
Alright, I've got my son married to a princess of England. Hopefully that will prove useful in the future.
I'm now the duke of ulster! (Dukes have more power than counts, which I was before.) The entire region is mine by right! Time to bow before me! (Well you should have been doing that before, but lower this time!)
To be continued...
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